Damn it!

Freaking pissed... i'm blogging since 3am... and ya~ agn... as usual... this freaking stupid lousy idiotic blogging! Error in saving... and there goes my nearly 2 hr-worth of entry go into the Virtual RUBBISH BIN! SUX! damn it~ so pissed off... and tat stupid 'recover post' function is another pc of SHIT! fuck!

anyway... i hav had alot to blog, a damn bloody lots of pic to be posted... but i'm bloody damn tired rite now, gonna ZZzz... not sure when i'm able to post all those up... ARGH....

Btw... Had my blog skin changed! haha~ am a bloody Narcissist! i admit it~ *muack*

jus one pic to end my entry:

-END-

~~~Good-Nite~~~

Work isn't everything...

Finally, i bk thru myself... i'm in a relax state... i had sent in my resignation letter, whether or not its a wise choice, i dun care, i can't bother it any more... after sending in my letter, i jus so relief... tat blackie been spreading rumors, been commenting behind my back saying how lousy i am and wat so not... i dun care... i dun need his comments, he is no one to made comments on me... but dun ever let mi hear any of it... since its the end, i'll jus shoot out watever i'm not happy wif... cos i dun care anymore...

money is my only concern... hmmm... planning planning planning... life is jus full of rubbish... jus depend on how u clear this shits... and understand that shit will always be shit! haha... well, ppl comment that i couldn't write but den... hmmm... i seriously think tat i couldn't write FORMAL english... my cursing and swearing is still perfect! haha... and ya... i neglect my blogging habit... oh gosh! shit! i should start blogging all over agn...

anyway, i jus watch 'The protege' not long ago... and i tell u, pls watch it, its bloody NICE! haha... i love it to the core... and guess who i'm watching for... it gotta be daniel wu?! ya wrong!!! ITS THAT MAN ~ ANDY LAU... haha... OMG! thou' he act as an bloody old man wif a head of white hairs... but... i jus love him... i jus love his acting, especially in scenes which he is require to be a real ANGRY MAN, shouting and scolding someone until the extend that he's so agitated that his veins shows... like one of his earlier movie 'Long zai bian yuan'... there's a scene which he scream at his 'godbro'... OMG! i jus love tat so much... and u can catch him agn in 'the protege'... OMG! i love him... he had become one of my fav artist... haha... worth watching seriously....

and oh ya, u can't miss out tat lady... hmmm... i dun rmb her name, i guess she's new... her first show... and u can't believe how gd she is... she's pretty and she can act real great! she will sure win one of the watever golder horse award...

obviously the storyline... other den jus another 'non-friction' movie... this show is like a documentary! telling u wats drug, how it come abt, y ppl take drugs, and the simple logic of economic! the demand and supply... there's demand, tat's y there's supply...to blame those drug Traffiker or drugs addict?? and understand tat even if u noe how harmful drugs are but u can nv get rid of it... and watch it to understand human nature... human jus love to blame other substances... like the drug addict blame it on those who supply them wif drugs... and the traffiker blame it on the demand of these drug addicts... so who is rite and who's wrong?

its not jus a movie that is so direct as u see, unlike those watever show, i.e. davinci code and sort... this show is more straight forward that u dun need to guess here and there... but however the art behind is to understand what its teaching... not jus abt 'Drugs are harmful' but abt human beings... ppl take drug out of 'heavenly feel'? NAH~ ppl take drugs out of 'lone' and 'empty'... watch it and u will noe it... hmmm... i mean WATCH and THINK and MAKE SENSE to it... hee~ enjoy~

Exhuasted... Tired...

I'm not doing good these days... really not... dun mistaken, all is abt work and only work...

I'm really exhuasted... my work pressure had affect my personal life... crying all days and nite... couldn't slp well... been falling sick... breaking down every now and den... everyone was like telling me... y? y make urself so troubled, so miserable... afterall its jus work... no pt letting it affect me... true... very true... perphaps am thinking too much... afraid of out of work... but somehow i find myself struggling to work... stay up late even if i'm tired, jus becos i dun wish to slp and wake up to another working day... tat's so hell... i broke down, i scream at my boss, i dare him to get me replaced... but i noe it takes time... and i couldn't wait anymore... should i jus leave? i wish to... but... to leave without a job is a big danger... a discount in my self market value... i dun wish to... i knew by enduring, by staying on... i can learn alot of things... but its too hell to stay on... its been troubling me all this while... thots of leaving, jus wanna take a break of work... do my studies... change of environment, rest my mind... but i jus concern too much of how others will feel, how i had disappoint my clients, they been giving mi chances and helping me... but still, work isn't my everything... i dun wanna carry on my life this way, tat's not wat i wan!

money into consideration... habit of spending... i dun noe how i am to survive without a job, without an income... but really too tired of all these shits...

leaving.... should i be hunting for another job? concentrade on studies while doing some part-time? accept the offer of doing a small biz?

i hav an interview tml... wif SMRT, doing leasing... i dun noe if i wish to be shortlisted... somehow i wish to be, so tat i can resign with a good reason... but i'm tired of working... on the other hand, i dun noe wat is there for me... will it be better or worse?

I spoke to my HR manager, the one who brought me into CPG, asking for a transfer back to NUS... he sound enthus, but he need me to speak to tat blackie as its not nice for him to intercept in between... hence, i spoke to blackie... he will only transfer me out when he get a replacement... and it will roughly take him a mth to find replacement and another mth for me to handover... its hell! 2 mths!!! if i dump my letter, it will take only one mth... and best after one mth, i'm totally out of this shit, whether they got a replacement anot, whether i welly hand over all my stuffs anot... doesn't matters anymore...

the stress level is hell... even my mum begin to encourage mi to leave the job, seeing me crying, depress, falling sick... my mum is a traditional chinese, she sure dun allow me to resign jus like tat but she jus can't bare to see me in this situation... she give me her support... she even come to me and say: "hav u dump ur letter? not yet! do u noe u need one mth notice! if u can't take it den resign, dun keep on holding on to it, and suffer! jus quit and slowly look for a job!"

To think of all this... i should jus leave and hack care everything.... i wanna hear from u guys... should i leave?