I'm not doing good these days... really not... dun mistaken, all is abt work and only work...
I'm really exhuasted... my work pressure had affect my personal life... crying all days and nite... couldn't slp well... been falling sick... breaking down every now and den... everyone was like telling me... y? y make urself so troubled, so miserable... afterall its jus work... no pt letting it affect me... true... very true... perphaps am thinking too much... afraid of out of work... but somehow i find myself struggling to work... stay up late even if i'm tired, jus becos i dun wish to slp and wake up to another working day... tat's so hell... i broke down, i scream at my boss, i dare him to get me replaced... but i noe it takes time... and i couldn't wait anymore... should i jus leave? i wish to... but... to leave without a job is a big danger... a discount in my self market value... i dun wish to... i knew by enduring, by staying on... i can learn alot of things... but its too hell to stay on... its been troubling me all this while... thots of leaving, jus wanna take a break of work... do my studies... change of environment, rest my mind... but i jus concern too much of how others will feel, how i had disappoint my clients, they been giving mi chances and helping me... but still, work isn't my everything... i dun wanna carry on my life this way, tat's not wat i wan!
money into consideration... habit of spending... i dun noe how i am to survive without a job, without an income... but really too tired of all these shits...
leaving.... should i be hunting for another job? concentrade on studies while doing some part-time? accept the offer of doing a small biz?
i hav an interview tml... wif SMRT, doing leasing... i dun noe if i wish to be shortlisted... somehow i wish to be, so tat i can resign with a good reason... but i'm tired of working... on the other hand, i dun noe wat is there for me... will it be better or worse?
I spoke to my HR manager, the one who brought me into CPG, asking for a transfer back to NUS... he sound enthus, but he need me to speak to tat blackie as its not nice for him to intercept in between... hence, i spoke to blackie... he will only transfer me out when he get a replacement... and it will roughly take him a mth to find replacement and another mth for me to handover... its hell! 2 mths!!! if i dump my letter, it will take only one mth... and best after one mth, i'm totally out of this shit, whether they got a replacement anot, whether i welly hand over all my stuffs anot... doesn't matters anymore...
the stress level is hell... even my mum begin to encourage mi to leave the job, seeing me crying, depress, falling sick... my mum is a traditional chinese, she sure dun allow me to resign jus like tat but she jus can't bare to see me in this situation... she give me her support... she even come to me and say: "hav u dump ur letter? not yet! do u noe u need one mth notice! if u can't take it den resign, dun keep on holding on to it, and suffer! jus quit and slowly look for a job!"
To think of all this... i should jus leave and hack care everything.... i wanna hear from u guys... should i leave?