u been telling mi tat i'm special in ur life, something more den fren... but do u really feel tat way? to mi, i'm nothing more den jus a 'listening money-lender'... when u need money, u look for mi... when u hav something which u want to share but dun wanna anyone to noe, u look for mi... i'm jus tat to u... i'm nth better den tat... is it fair? when its my turn to face a prob... where u? u can gif mi reason saying tat u actually wanted to mit mi earlier but i called u at 8pm, too late and u dun wanna stay out for too late... to u, u feel nth, jus reject someone who is un-important... but to mi, ultimate upset... and who noe? do u noe? or rather do u even bother? and the following week, u claim tat u not bking out on weekend, u will be bking out on a weekday, will call me out for a chat or something... but did u? same thing... do u even care? only until i sms u ask u when r u bking out? u said tat u already bk out for the week and back to camp liao... wat the f**k? and the following week, i ask u out... and wat f**k up reason u gave mi? saying tat u will be booking out at a later time and u will be off to do some stuff and will mit mi at a later time... and ya, wat f**k i got? calling u back @ 7pm+, wat i got frm u... u haven settle ur stuffs and guess won't be miting mi... oh my... trying to be understanding, i kept quiet... do u really understand mi? knowing who i really am? u can come and remind yrs ago wat did we chat abt... ever ask mi, when we go into different school, will we still keep in contact? and i say 'difficult'... but the main problem is do u even care? hav u ever notice? its alway u come and look for mi and not the other way rd... y is it so? jus like the case here... if i go look for u, will u even care? so wat am i? jus a listener... worst den a counsellor, at least they r paid to listen... and mi? so wat really piss mi off? yesterday... did u bother to even sms me to mit up wif mi? nope... u fuck care mi... and y? cos u r currently contented wif ur life and u hav nth to tok abt... and ya, i dun care if u wanna come and mit mi... but wat i really fucking fed-up is... when u were to mit up wif mi, u r tired, u wanna reach home early, wanna spend more time @ home... but if u were to go for mid-nite movie wif them, u r not tired, u r fucking energetic, u dun hav to spend more time wif family... wat the fuck? and ya, as if i dun noe them... u went for a mid-nite movie wif them, u dun even bother to ask mi if i wanna tag along... u dun even care... i do wat i can... in fact, i dun even wanna join ur yesterday, cos i dun wanna see how happy u r wif UR FREN... but y do she wanna keep wanting mi to mit ur, it only hurt me more... but maybe no one noe... but y? y is our so called 'very damn bloody good frenship' only exist when there only mi and u... and it become a piece of shit when we r out as a big grp... becos of man's ego... i keep quiet, i dun wanna let anyone noe wat happen between us... help u wif ur secret... even try to to shout @ u yesterday when so many ppl is ard... u may think tat i'm jus agn, trying to hide myself up but nope, i'm jus trying to save ur face... and i believe tat's the last thing tat i'll do for u... i noe wat i did jus a minute ago might make u suffer also... but seriously, since i'm nth to u den y will u even be sad... i really hope tat i'm the one who suffer and no one else... maybe to u, i'm really nth... but to mi, u ever is one of my very good or even best fren, jus not its no longer the same... but no matter wat, i dun wish to see u suffer... and let mi suffer alone in stead... jus leave mi alone...
so who gng to listen to mi? selfish human beings agn... no one i can tok to and so i prefer not to tok abt it to anyone, rather den a dead blog... and wat else... i mean even he can do this to mi, who else i can really believe? and ya, not only him but also some other ppl who i dun wish to mention... cos when the person whom u believe most and trust most had dissapoint u, no one else u can trust anymore...