For me, I choose to divert my attention.. divert back to myself.. being in a 3 years relationship and walking out of it make me realize the mistakes that many many human beings had commit.. not about taking a relationship too seriously but allowing yourself to love someone more than loving yourself...
Me too, I did this mistake, I allow myself to turn ugly, to feel ugly, even dont dare to step on a weighing scale, even spend lesser time looking into a mirror..
Changes took over me, I gain weight, to like almost 15kg more. I felt old, I dump my face mask at a side for it rot. I did less make up, can even be too lazy for any make up.. I stop shopping cos either I cant find my size or nice clothes just turn out to be sux on me!
I was depress for like a month.. I even thot at my age of 27, am too old to step into another relationship when all good guys had already found their special someone.. Gradually I choose to pick myself up from there.. Thanks to the supports from my loving mum who told me there is nothing to be afraid of even if a women stay single forever.. Thanks to my very very nice boyfriends, my really true buddies who will stand by me, wipe my tears, listen to me, without a single bad intention, only pure concerns.. They stood by me, whenever I need a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, they are there. Even thou' I once forsake them a guy who I thot I'll marry him. Life is all about changes. Changes occurs when u least expected it, I totally never expect myself to be single again, to not getting marry in year 2013, to have all these friends with me, to love myself again.
Just as times passed, I realized that no one knows how to love me more than I do.. I begin to think how do I get back to when I begin.. Age is something I can't stop, but physically, mentally, I am able to.. Since now am a free soul, I have a lot of time for myself, my focus is again back to myself and not any other people or things. Since the break up brought along depression, sleepless nights and loss of appetite which make me shed a little bit of weight, I must work on dieting.
Trust me, am born a fatty bom bom even since my school daze... Looking back at my own pic, I felt hilarious yet happy that I had changed so much.
This was like taken when am 16. When everyone is sharing about youth, all I have a FATS! My face look as thou I'm been beaten up till it swell like nobody biz. Scary indeed. Nothing change me much, I continue my life to my poly times...
Yes, that's my poly years, trust me.. I look like this for like 3 years of polytechnic times.. Speechless.. totally.. and I was always been mistaken as a butch.. (well.. am not..) something hit me when poly over, I just felt I love being in the lime light, I wanna look good.. and yeah.. dieting start.. As a lazy being, I don't quite enjoy sports.. My dieting is strictly only curbing my hungry, in a very unhealthy way.. but at the age of 20, metabolism rate is still at the high side, slimming seem much easier..
I begin to look much better.. at least I dress more lady like.. I begin My journey to be a tanned bitch.. I head the clubs, head the beach every week, continue dieting.. Took the slimming supplement, off the shelves ones, like extrium X, xando... even went for doctor's prescriptions, reductil...
And this is what I am in my 22 year old... My best state... Totally love who I was that moment.. young and gorgeous... but again... Thats when my youth truly begin and I got my nick, DeSoLo.. but again... DeSoLo is a rubber band... I went fat again, probably with the pamper of love...
In a relationship, I tend to gain weight.. and i even stop doing tanning as I gain weight, i lost my confident.. and gradually, I learn about this MLM company which is into acupuncture slimming, so I went for it..
and Tadah....
Am back to a gorgeous baby... but DeSoLo love food... and I have a habit of not wanting to waste food... I always over-ordered and end up over-eat...
This was taken during my Thailand trip last year, May 2012.. yes.. from my best state, I gain 15KG! BLOODY 15KG!!! OMG! I reduce all my camwhoring habit and allow myself to turn into a auntie!!!
Since December 2012 when my relationship became rocky, all drama started.. and yes.. I lost weight again... In Jan 2013, I start doing my exercising, dieting, detoxing... I start watching my food intake, stop when am full.. and exercise as much as I can, at least once a week minimum... I hit the pool again.. I became tanned.. I even went for slimming massage to kill the cellulite issue on my big fat thighs... I took my meal replacements and strictly follow thru...
This is what I am today.. photo taken this morning.. definitely I look more matured... I lost so far a 10KG, I still got another 5KG to go... but I promise that I won't let the weight come back ever again... Jia you! Finally I found myself back.. and yes.. exercise... I have so many things in mind... I wanna start hot yoga, I wanna go for IPL, I wanna have my hair perm and dyed... Continue my love for myself..
If I can do it, I believe everyone can...
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